Expectations: Fuel for Resentment, or Critical Growth Factor?

The Stories We Tell Ourselves About Others Can Wreak Havoc in Relationships

When Melissa Hughes talks about expectations, she puts them into four categories:

1. Expectations of yourself
2. Expectations for yourself
3. Expectations of others
4. Expectations for others

As an educator, she knows that students will be more successful when a teacher has high expectations of them. She also knows that expectations, when not managed and understood, can fuel resentment in a relationship.

What's really fascinating is that when an expectation isn't met, it can have devastating effects, so devastating that our brain reacts in the same way as when we feel physical pain.

Feel good neural transmitters are released when our expectations are met - and they drop dramatically when our expectations are NOT met, especially when it is a surprise to us.

We tell ourselves stories of the people around us, stories of what we believe they will do, no matter what evidence we have about our past experience with them. Listen to the conversation to learn more.

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Melissa Hughes is a talented speaker, and author of Happy Hour with Einstein. To learn more about her talents with every different kind of audience, visit her website. And be sure to connect with her on LinkedIn, and follow her on YouTube to be notified of her upcoming engagements, blog and video posts, and book releases.

Why It Works with Joe Kwon - Storytelling

5.0 Why It Works: Sarah Elkins on Storytelling

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Have you ever wondered why some storytellers mesmerize you and others give Ambien a run for its money? How come some stories you tell have people on the edge of their seat and others induce yawns? Did you know that there is a lot more than words that goes into telling a good story?

In today's episode of "Why It Works," Sarah Elkins, a leadership and storytelling coach, reveals some of the hidden mechanisms behind storytelling. Listen in to find out the connection between vulnerability and storytelling, how lessons from music can improve your storytelling and the one thing that drives Sarah crazy about bad storytellers.

An Unlikely Foundation for Optimism

Some Stories Teach Us the Wrong Lessons - At First

When she was a teenager, Jennifer Heflin overheard a conversation between her parents that gave her the impression the only way to succeed in business is to be aggressive, unkind, and ruthless.

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That was the story she told herself as she completed her MBA at Wharton, and started her career on Wall Street. It stuck with her so deeply that she left Wall Street because she simply didn't have that cutthroat attitude and the environment didn't work for her.

As she started to process her career, and focused on mindfulness and self-reflection, she realized that the culture she experienced was just one perspective of the business world. Her awakening moment came to her in the early morning on a beautiful spring day: It doesn't have to be that way.

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Jennifer Heflin is a personal development coach with a focus on meditation, mindfulness, emotional mastery and empowerment. She is also the founder of Angels Evolution, a company on a mission to bring personal growth to the business world. You can find Jennifer’s podcast, Embracing Mastery, on iTunes, Spreaker, SoundCloud and YouTube.

The Stories You Share Define You

The Stories You Share Demonstrate Your Character

When Kyle Burt shared the story of creating a roller hockey team from scratch at Arizona State University, and how he did it, I was immediately intrigued.

This is far less common than I used to think: Some people do what they say they're going to do. And they dive head first into whatever it is, there's no toe-dipping for people like that.

As soon as I heard Kyle's story, I knew a few things about his character. He told the story with some level of humor and humility, not taking all the credit himself, and he shared the story as a reminder that we can all do what we set out to do if we use our resources and follow through. He didn't need to tell me he was a "do-er", that he is a leader, or that he has a sense of humor. He demonstrated all of those things in his story.

The great thing about our lives is that as adults, we choose our next move, our response to situations, and the people we spend time with. When we surround ourselves with people who support us, encourage us, and who have the enthusiasm to follow through with us, we can accomplish great things.

Connect with Kyle on LinkedIn, watch a recent episode of his show, #CoffeeWithKyles, and visit his website to learn more about him.