Your Stories Don’t Define You
How You Tell Them Will
A podcast to unlock your stories and uncover meaningful insights.
207: Want to Bring Out the Best In People? Listen to Them.
Listen, Ask Questions, Give Them An Answer
Have you ever had a job working for a difficult or mean boss? Or maybe you are a boss that struggles to connect with your employees? Thomas Jackson’s most memorable bosses are the ones who listened to his ideas and either implemented them or let them know why not.
Listen to Sarah Elkins and Thomas Jackson, as they discuss the difference between an encouraging leader and a negative one. In this episode, Sarah and Thomas dive into this topic and share the memorable moments, whether good or bad, from their work experiences and the long-term effects on workers. They also talk about the No Longer Virtual event, and how you can build your professional network face-to-face.
Join in to see how your work environment can change based on the attitudes of the people around you.
“The difference between a nice person showing up in different ways, versus a mean person showing up the same way.”
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
About Thomas:
Thomas Jackson is a UPS Driver Helper and Belt Splitter.
He enjoys writing articles for his LinkedIn profile and has over 2,000+ articles on the platform.
Visit Thomas’ LinkedIn profile and don’t hesitate to dive into his collection of articles.
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 77: You Can Find Joy and Satisfaction in Whatever You Do
During our conversation, I mentioned a post Thom published a few years ago about needles from one of his knitting machines that got lost in the cracks of the hardwood floor beneath them.
Take Time to See the Value of What You Do, and the Impact You Can Have - Wherever You Sit
I met Thom Boehm on LinkedIn shortly after he published his first blog on that platform. I was immediately intrigued by his writing; direct, thoughtful, insightful, and relevant.
During our conversation, I mentioned a post Thom published a few years ago about needles from one of his knitting machines that got lost in the cracks of the hardwood floor beneath them. We spoke about how Lost in the Cracks was an insightful metaphor for people and things that seem to disappear because we don’t see an immediate use or purpose for them, but when we take time to look in those cracks in life, we find great purpose for those people and things that have been lost.
Knitting machines at Stanfield’s.
What caught my attention from the beginning is Thom’s genuine ability to find joy and value in whatever he is doing. He understands his motivation and needs with clarity few people seem to possess. He knows himself well enough to know that his work environment is as important - if not MORE important - than the work he is doing.
Thom’s description of his workplace is filled with a true passion for the building itself, the hardwood floors, the windows, even the ceiling beams. He speaks of the knitting machines he maintains with reverence, giving them personality and character, almost like a cherished family pet.
If more of us were present, grateful, and inspired by the details around us, perhaps our world would simply be a more kind and joyful place.
It's the Shoes. Trust Me.
I was in high school when I stopped wearing shoes. There was probably a reason, as far as reason goes when you're in high school, but I can't imagine any reason beyond pushing my mother's buttons.
~ Picture courtesy of Eliza Wiley
I was in high school when I stopped wearing shoes. There was probably a reason, as far as reason goes when you're in high school, but I can't imagine any reason beyond pushing my mother's buttons.
My feet were tough and thick with calluses from the moment the snow melted in Colorado until the first frost hit. I would carry my shoes, just in case I needed them to be allowed into a store or restaurant. From my sophomore year of high school until I graduated from Colorado State University in Fort Collins, I was known for my bare feet. As an exchange student my sophomore year, I even hitchhiked by myself through New Zealand with bare feet. I'm pretty sure I was the only business major with bare feet and cut-off jeans. When I was walking through Moby Gym with my father, getting ready to graduate, we ran into a few of my professors and I was happy to introduce them to my dad.
Oh my! We were just placing bets on whether Sarah would wear shoes to cross the graduation stage.
When I think back on that interchange, I like to remember my dad smiling good naturedly, and not totally embarrassed, but I really don't recall his reaction. I smiled and lifted my graduation robe enough to show some pretty pumps. It was December, I was definitely wearing shoes.
I moved to Washington DC for a paid internship immediately following graduation. My father drove with me across the country in my little Chevette with my cat on the floor under the passenger seat. Of course I wore shoes every day to my job with the US International Trade Commission; as soon as the weather warmed a bit, you could find me wandering on weekends through the District, shoes in hand. I think back on that time and I'm totally disgusted. Really, Sarah? Barefoot in Washington DC? It didn't take long for me to change my ways. Not only is it gross to walk barefoot on the streets and sidewalks in a big city, it gets very, very hot.
Shoes were simply a function of getting dressed back then. I had my basic pumps in black and navy for work, and my casual sandals and tennis shoes for weekends, and that was about it. I absentmindedly put on two different colored shoes on my first day of work at a new job... but that story is all it's own.
Shoes didn't become anything important -- or even more than a passing thought - until I took my first job in sales.
As the director of sales at a downtown boutique hotel, I had the opportunity to dress up and be a little creative in my style. In my time working with clients and staff at the hotel, I noticed a distinct difference in how I was being perceived and treated when I wore shoes with a heel height of two inches or more. Observation has always been a strength of mine, and I took notes about the phenomena for a few weeks; it wasn't a serious scientific study, but the conclusions were obvious to me.
Shoes come with attitude for some of us. When I was struggling with a difficult boss, my dear friend sent me a package with this note in it:
Wear these bright yellow sandals and bring your own sunshine to work this week! - Let the haters hate!
They were three inch platform strappy yellow sandals and yes, I did wear them to work. My attitude was decidedly improved that day. Sometimes a little cue to catch my eye can work wonders on my internal dialogue. It's like a little spark of distraction; a reminder of who I am, and that while I cannot control someone else's behavior, I won't let it define me and my behavior.
Someone recently shared an article describing financial advantages of being tall; there are other studies to show that tall women are generally more successful in business. (I like to point out that I am one of the most comfortable people on any airplane, a distinct advantage when traveling.)
Though my titles haven't included the word "sales" since then, I've continued my observations about the differences when I'm a little bit taller, in how I believe I am perceived based on the treatment I receive by others.
I've come to some conclusions that have helped me over the past few years and I'm hopeful that those observations and strategies will help others. Here's one that I've shared a lot recently and have heard some great reviews following experiences by those who've tried it:
When you are planning your wardrobe for an event, meeting, or other important date, start with your shoes. Your shoes are the foundation of your wardrobe. Find shoes that make you feel good about the way you walk, the way you stand, the way you carry yourself. Invest in shoes that are comfortable AND that offer an indication of your style. Build your outfit around your shoes.
Try this strategy soon, and please comment and let me know your thoughts after you do your own experiment!
I know it sounds like a small detail, and it IS a small detail in the scheme of things. Like many other small details, like the grip of your handshake, the wrinkles around your eyes when you smile, and holding a door open for someone behind you, this one matters.
Sharing stories is a great way to communicate. Listen to my recent podcast to learn more about me and the work I do to help people communicate through storytelling.
Comments on this post:
Thank you for the belly laugh as I visualized you traipsing around Colorado sans shoes. Probably made you a more grounded person, though! Putting one's best foot forward is always a confidence booster. As women, we have many ways to add flair and customize our own sense of style and personality to others. For me, it is probably my passion to wear an heirloom or uncommon-type necklace to put my best self out in the world each and every day.
Sarah- Fantastic article thank you for sharing. I agree 100'% it's the shoes, I can not leave my house without a fierce pair of stilettos that make me feel like I could take over the world and people always remember me by the shoes