444 Pivot Point: A Recent Story with Lessons from the Past
Watching the drama unfold at the airport brought it all back to me, the challenges of being a parent, especially of a toddler, and the ridiculousness of the judgment I experienced. Judged if I lost track of the toddler and judged by having the wrist tether on him. Judged if I give in to the tantrum and judged for walking away from the cartful of groceries.
It’s hard enough being a parent, with all the self-doubt and exhaustion, do we really need to add a stranger’s judgment to the equation?
Offering compassion to that father was a full-circle moment for me, a pivot-point in the realization that my experiences from the past truly shaped who I am today.
Summertime is hard on podcasters!
We lose a lot of our listeners this time of year and it can be difficult to be motivated to keep putting out quality content when we know people aren’t as likely to listen.
This summer I’ve been focused on brief, less than 20-minute episodes that keep a person’s attention while still offering insights and entertainment.
What you’ve been hearing, and will continue to hear in each episode, is a brief story of pivotal moment in my life, and then a thread pulled to generate insights about it. I have two goals for you, dear listeners:
One – to uncover your related story for you to add to your collection to practice and have ready when the opportunity presents itself.
And two – to demonstrate storytelling in a practical, approachable way so you hear how I compose my words, phrases, and use tone-of-voice to add dynamics and meaning.
In today’s episode you’ll hear two stories from my past, and a recent story that demonstrates insights from them. We experience meaningful moments every day, things that shape who we are and how we behave into the future, but most of us don’t think about life that way.
I’ve heard people talk about how raising kids takes a village, but when it's time to offer assistance and support, they quickly turn to judgment instead. Shaking their heads and “tsk tsk”ing under their breath, as if a parent doesn’t see your expression or hear your judgment.
And that’s not helpful.
Most of us have been on the other side of the equation, accidentally cutting someone off in traffic, and then a few minutes later honking at someone who does the same thing. Or allowing our frustration to erupt in a loud voice at our kid, and years later judging a parent for the same behavior.
It was my experience as a parent that helped me see things from that perspective, but it shouldn’t take being in their shoes to offer compassion and assistance.
Watching the drama unfold at the airport brought it all back to me, the challenges of being a parent, especially of a toddler, and the ridiculousness of the judgment I experienced. Judged if I lost track of the toddler and judged by having the wrist tether on him. Judged if I give in to the tantrum and judged for walking away from the cartful of groceries.
It’s hard enough being a parent, with all the self-doubt and exhaustion, do we really need to add external judgment to the equation?
Offering compassion to that father was a full-circle moment for me, a pivot-point in the realization that my experiences from the past truly shaped who I am today.
Listeners, now it’s your turn:
Did a memory come back to you when you heard my stories in the episode?
Did you see yourself in one or more of the characters, and did that generate an insight or discomfort in you? Remember, discomfort can be a powerful tool for self-reflection!
Is there something you’ll intentionally be more aware of after listening? Something you’ll try to do differently when faced with an opportunity for compassion and support instead of judgment?
After more than 430 episodes of this podcast, I was recently inspired to change the format of the show.
The new format for my show aligns with what I’m learning about narrative identity (how the stories we tell about ourselves internally and externally influence our identity) and demonstrates what I’ve been teaching for years: Sharing a story to reveal who you are and what matters to you.
My hope is that future episodes will offer more clarity about great storytelling and how to find and explore pivotal moments to demonstrate who we are.
About Sarah:
Sarah is a Montana based workplace communication trainer, TEDx speaker, DisruptHR speaker, public speaking coach, professional storyteller, musician, and podcast host. Her workshops and coaching packages with teams and their leaders are known to address and reduce miscommunication – the most common cause of tension and stress in the workplace. Using the team’s results from the StrengthsFinder assessment, she guides teams in learning to speak each other’s “language”, learning to value each other’s strengths and connecting with each other through enhanced self-reflection and effective listening.
Sarah’s nearly 20 years working in government agencies inspired her to complete her MBA and to achieve her StrengthsFinder certification to improve work environments for others, guiding teams toward increased satisfaction, productivity, and happiness.
Visit her website to purchase her book, Your Stories Don't Define You in paperback or audiobook.
443 Pivot Point: Realizing You Predicted the Future
I don’t know who unearthed this old episode, but when I looked at recent analytics for my website and podcast, this one had suddenly re-emerged. So I looked at it and listened to it and had a pretty big insight.
Some of us were already talking about the desperation for connection we were seeing in our communities, even before COVID-19, even before our political environment was so seriously compromised and created irreconcilable division.
It feels meaningful, this recovery of an old episode right now, as if I could see where things were headed and voiced my concern years before things really devolved.
Your stories don’t define you. How you tell them will.
Hi! I’m Sarah Elkins, your host and chief storymaker at Elkins Consulting.
If you’ve been listening to my show for a while, you’ve probably noticed a big change in the format in recent weeks.
Summertime is hard on podcasters! We lose a lot of our listeners this time of year and it can be difficult to be motivated to keep putting out quality content when we know people aren’t as likely to listen.
This summer I’ve been focused on brief, less than 20-minute episodes that keep a person’s attention while still offering insights and entertainment.
What you’ve been hearing, and will continue to hear in each episode, is a brief story of pivotal moment in my life, and then a thread pulled to generate insights about it. I have two goals for you, dear listeners:
One – to uncover your related story for you to add to your collection to practice and have ready when the opportunity presents itself.
And two – to demonstrate storytelling in a practical, approachable way so you hear how I compose my words, phrases, and use tone-of-voice to add dynamics and meaning.
In today’s episode you’ll hear an early episode of my podcast, #17, recorded and posted in December of 2017 called Desperate for Connection.
I’m re-sharing it, nearly 6 years later, because it’s still so relevant – even more relevant now.
I don’t know who unearthed this old episode, but when I looked at recent analytics for my website and podcast, this one had suddenly re-emerged. So I looked at it and listened to it and had a pretty big insight.
Some of us were already talking about the desperation for connection we were seeing in our communities, even before COVID-19, even before our political environment was so seriously compromised and created irreconcilable division.
It feels meaningful, this recovery of an old episode right now, as if I could see where things were headed and voiced my concern years before things really devolved.
After you listen, it’ll be your turn:
Did a memory come back to you when you heard my stories in the episode?
Did you see yourself in one or more of the characters, and did that generate an insight or discomfort in you?
What will you do with this insight or discomfort?
I hope you’ll see yourself in one or more of the characters at different times in your life, and that you’ll make active, intentional decisions to shift the dynamic of loneliness by connecting with someone with genuine care.
Whether that’s offering a real, loving smile to a cashier at the grocery store or coffee shop, holding the door open for the person behind you, smiling and waving to let someone into a busy intersection or highway, or offering assistance to someone struggling to carry a heavy load.
Thanks for listening to Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will. Are you curious to learn about working with me? Visit my website, elkinsconsulting.com to schedule time to chat and sign up for periodic updates about my work, and connect with me on Instagram, LinkedIn, and Facebook for content about strengthsfinder, storytelling, public speaking.
After more than 430 episodes of this podcast, I was recently inspired to change the format of the show.
The new format for my show aligns with what I’m learning about narrative identity (how the stories we tell about ourselves internally and externally influence our identity) and demonstrates what I’ve been teaching for years: Sharing a story to reveal who you are and what matters to you.
My hope is that future episodes will offer more clarity about great storytelling and how to find and explore pivotal moments to demonstrate who we are.
About Sarah:
Sarah is a Montana based workplace communication trainer, TEDx speaker, DisruptHR speaker, public speaking coach, professional storyteller, musician, and podcast host. Her workshops and coaching packages with teams and their leaders are known to address and reduce miscommunication – the most common cause of tension and stress in the workplace. Using the team’s results from the StrengthsFinder assessment, she guides teams in learning to speak each other’s “language”, learning to value each other’s strengths and connecting with each other through enhanced self-reflection and effective listening.
Sarah’s nearly 20 years working in government agencies inspired her to complete her MBA and to achieve her StrengthsFinder certification to improve work environments for others, guiding teams toward increased satisfaction, productivity, and happiness.
Visit her website to purchase her book, Your Stories Don't Define You in paperback or audiobook.
386 Media Literacy and Division
In the age of the internet it is impossibly easy for us to see something shocking and outrageous, ending up with us emotionally and morally outraged. We want to speak up, to make our voices heard in the sea of noise if only for a moment. However, it is easy for us to make a mistake on who we follow or share posts from, it is very easy to be fooled by a wolf in sheep’s clothing, which is why it is vital to stop, take a moment to do some basic research, and make our own informed decision.
In today’s episode, Sarah Elkin’s has a solo show dedicated to her thoughts on media literacy, the division that has been amplified by social media, and how important it is that we not only do our own fact checking, but that we also convey our thoughts and stories with intention in order to accurately portray what we believe.
386 Media Literacy and Division
In the age of the internet it is impossibly easy for us to see something shocking and outrageous, ending up with us emotionally and morally outraged. We want to speak up, to make our voices heard in the sea of noise if only for a moment. However, it is easy for us to make a mistake on who we follow or share posts from, it is very easy to be fooled by a wolf in sheep’s clothing, which is why it is vital to stop, take a moment to do some basic research, and make our own informed decision.
In today’s episode, Sarah Elkin’s has a solo show dedicated to her thoughts on media literacy, the division that has been amplified by social media, and how important it is that we not only do our own fact checking, but that we also convey our thoughts and stories with intention in order to accurately portray what we believe.
Highlights
Sharing the right stories with intention, that are compelling and true.
What are you doing in your daily life that does more harm than good? How do you engage with the people and world around you?
You never really know who is listening to you, whether it is our phones and social media, or the people around us.
Quotes
“You don’t have to tell people who you are or what matters to you. They come to those conclusions through the stories they hear.”
“But if I’m too busy to check the source, maybe I shouldn’t have shared it at all. Everything we do has consequences and if we don’t consider the ‘what happens next?’ question, we damage relationships, our reputations, and miss incredible opportunities. We contribute to the noise of division.”
Dear Listeners it is now your turn,
I challenge you, to either stop scrolling, I know it’s hard. Or take inventory for a few days as you participate. Are your emotions like a rollercoaster as you scroll, feeling really good when you see something you agree with and getting angry, discouraged, or judgey when you see something you don’t? Before you hit that like button ask yourself what your intention is when engaging. Are you sure what you’re sharing is true? If you’re sharing someone else’s story, is this a stranger? Are you trusting their opinion over somebody in a similar situation who might be your neighbor or someone in your community? Ask yourself what exactly you’re signaling to people by engaging on the post, are you putting something out there that is insulting to people you care about? I am so discouraged and disgusted by the division and polarization, and if you are too, then stop contributing to it.
And, as always, thank you for listening.
About Sarah
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course as well to make sure you nail that next interview!