Episode 183: Some Stories Are Meant to Be Told... Differently
Her life didn't start with unicorns and butterflies, and like many people who grow up without, she didn't really know it until school years when the comparison game began... seeing other girls with new, trendy clothes and all the accessories made her keenly aware of what she didn't have.
It's Not the Same Old Story with Lisa Caprelli
183 podcast cover art Lisa Caprelli image and quote
Her life didn't start with unicorns and butterflies, and like many people who grow up without, she didn't really know it until her high school years when the comparison games began. Seeing other girls with new, trendy clothes and all the accessories made her keenly aware of what she didn't have.
She knew there was more for her, and when a mentor saw her for the curious, ambitious, intelligent young woman she was, Lisa's natural talents were nurtured and expanded.
When she decided it was time to leave Texas and make her way to the beaches of southern California, people told her she was crazy, that she'd fail, and that she'd waste precious money and time trying to be something she wasn't. She didn't listen, thank goodness, because over the past 10 years, she has made significant, high impact, positive contributions to our communities, like her multiple best selling children's books, an Amazon TV series, and a successful marketing business.
Lisa did what others saw as impossible.
183 podcast cover art Lisa Caprelli quote
What makes Lisa so good at what she does? What motivated her to find her path? Listen to this episode of Your Stories Don't Define You to find out!
Visit Lisa's website to learn more about her work, and check out her children's book series, Unicorn Jazz. Be sure to follow her on LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to keep up with the great content she shares.
ABOUT SARAH:
Image of Sarah Elkins with promo language: ”story sharing coaching for leaders”
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
Audiobook promotional cover art
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 163: Life Will Blindside You, Sometimes Literally
Some of us make plans for the future, some simply let each day define and shape the next. I don't think any of us anticipate every potential scenario of change, transformation, or trauma. Even the most morbid or realistic of us cannot predict or prepare for the reality of tomorrow.
That's what Maria Johnson realized as she received the diagnosis of a rare disease that was quickly denying her the ability to see. She had been concerned about her eyesight, went for dozens of tests as she realized it was getting worse. It wasn't until 7 months after she went for her first doctor visit, and only one month prior to completely losing her vision and becoming legally blind, that she finally received her diagnosis. And there was nothing to be done. No cure. No treatment.
A Story of Becoming Blind at 50
Some of us make plans for the future, some simply let each day define and shape the next. I don't think any of us anticipate every potential scenario of change, transformation, or trauma. Even the most morbid or realistic of us cannot predict or prepare for the reality of tomorrow.
That's what Maria Johnson realized as she received the diagnosis of a rare disease that was quickly denying her the ability to see. She had been concerned about her eyesight, went for dozens of tests as she realized it was getting worse. It wasn't until 7 months after she went for her first doctor visit, and only one month prior to completely losing her vision and becoming legally blind, that she finally received her diagnosis. And there was nothing to be done. No cure. No treatment.
For a long time she held out hope that she would be the exception. That her vision would return if she just believed, worked hard enough, was lucky.
Her doctor finally had the most painful conversation with her. He told her it was time to grieve her loss of vision. It wasn't coming back. It was time to consider the reality of the situation, grieve, and move on.
Maria shared the story of trying to shop for a prom dress with her daughter, the painful and beautiful way she found her own ability, despite the limitations of her disability, to participate in a meaningful way, with the help of her son and a large format iPad.
When you listen to Maria speak about her experience, you'll hear the unresolved questions of why, and you'll also hear her resolve to make her life, and the lives of those around her, a different kind of normal, an extraordinary normal, if that's a thing.
I know, it doesn't make sense, and none of it does. Something so tragic in a person's life can go so many different ways. Maria could have fallen into despair, she could have lived as a "poor me" and no one would fault her for it.
Or she could have taken the path of least resistance and simply made her way through life with the skills she had, the people she had in her life, and been, well, mediocre.
She didn't do any of that. She started a blog to share her experiences, to guide others with loss of vision, and to bring some comfort to the support network of those people, to share what their friends and family needed when they lost their vision.
She grew, transformed, and found her way toward growing new dreams, new goals. You might just be surprised what someone like Maria can do.
To learn more about her, visit her website, and follow her on LinkedIn and Facebook.
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ABOUT SARAH:
Purchase the audiobook here.
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically
with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 162: When Your World Crashes Down, You Rebuild by Helping Others
Charles Clark's mother wanted to fix it. She was desperate to see her son climb back up from the deep, deep hole she was watching him experience. Seeing someone we love in despair is likely the most painful grief.
"What can I do, Charles. How can I help you?"
"No mom, this is something I have to do myself."
When I heard this story, my eyes filled with tears. All I could think about was his mother's pain and pride in that moment. The pain of helplessness and the pride in hearing those words.
For An Athlete, An Injury Can Put Your Identity and Your Story to the Test
Charles Clark's mother wanted to fix it. She was desperate to see her son climb back up from the deep, deep hole she was watching him experience. Seeing someone we love in despair is likely the most painful grief.
"What can I do, Charles. How can I help you?"
"No mom, this is something I have to do myself."
When I heard this story, my eyes filled with tears. All I could think about was his mother's pain and pride in that moment. The pain of helplessness and the pride in hearing those words.
That wasn't the only story Charles shared in this episode that brought tears to my eyes, and we laughed, too. This was an hour of incredible story sharing, I think I experienced every emotion as this masterful storyteller opened his world for me to experience with him.
If you haven't heard of Charles Clark, the former World-Class American sprinter, now inspirational speaker, you'll be so glad to meet him through this episode of Your Stories Don't Define You.
And if you did know a little about him, you might just become an even bigger fan after listening in to our conversation.
Connect with Charles on LinkedIn, visit his website, and be sure to follow him on Facebook (that's where I discovered this amazing guy) and Instagram!
Charles Clark, the creator of the Thrive Planner and the Thrive Tribe Podcast, is an expert in habit improvement, discovering purpose, vision creating and goal setting. After he became the 6th fastest man in the world, a devastating injury left him searching for his identity. Charles developed techniques that brought clarity to his life’s purpose while establishing massive confidence.
Charles’ modern transformation strategies, empowering presentations, and high-performance mindset hacks have made him a sought-after speaker and coach for leading organizations like Dick’s Sporting Goods, Nike, Raymond James Financial, Frontier Communications, iHeart Radio, US Army, and FSU.
About Sarah:
Purchase the audiobook here.
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically
with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 131: Make Kind Loud - It's the Only Way Out of This Mess
Louisa Garrett used to rely on her sarcastic sense of humor to make people laugh. But when she saw herself through the eyes of her nieces and nephews, as a model for the behavior she wanted to see in them - and in others, she had an epiphany. Being sarcastic was not a kind sense of humor, sarcasm can certainly be funny, but it is rarely kind.
"It's Better to Be Kind than to be Funny" - Louisa Garrett
Louisa Garrett used to rely on her sarcastic sense of humor to make people laugh. But when she saw herself through the eyes of her nieces and nephews, as a model for the behavior she wanted to see in them - and in others, she had an epiphany. Being sarcastic was not a kind sense of humor, sarcasm can certainly be funny, but it is rarely kind.
As the youngest of a gaggle of kids, Louisa loved to be the center of attention. She’d do anything silly to make her siblings laugh, and developed a reputation for lightening difficult situations and conversations with her sense of humor.
Now, as we finally begin to address the issues of racism and bigotry in the most substantial way since the days of MLK Jr., Louisa has her work cut out for her. She knows that all any of us can do is be kind to each other, “stand in the gap” to support the efforts of our communities to address systemic racism and bigotry, and demonstrate the thoughtfulness and compassion we want to see in others.
You can learn more about Louisa by visiting her website, and by following her fantastic activity on Facebook.
Are you ready to find clarity? The next Finding Purpose through Your Natural Strengths course begins July 8, 2020, and runs for 8 weeks, every Wednesday. Schedule a call to find out if this course is right for you.
Episode 130: I Will Not Meet Hate at the Door, Lessons of Love and Forgiveness
What's really significant about Heather's words is that she backs them up with real action and and her behavior absolutely brings that message home. She chooses love, learning, and personal growth in response to the adversity she experienced as a child and young adult.
Stories of Love and Learning Through Adversity
Heather’s TEDx Colorado Springs - Transforming Adversity into Opportunity
Heather Younger is no stranger to adversity. Born to a white, Jewish mother and a black father, her mother's family was less than welcoming, and Heather grew up without any contact with the majority of that family.
What's really significant about Heather's words is that she backs them up with real action and and her behavior absolutely brings that message home. She chooses love, learning, and personal growth in response to the adversity she experienced as a child and young adult.
Now is the time for us to amplify messages like Heather's, to listen closely to her stories not to get angry or frustrated, but to learn how to hold space for learning and compassion for those who mistreat us.
Heather and I connected early in my LinkedIn activity, and we've had the opportunity to spend real time together - in person. She was one of the first to sign on to participate in the inaugural No Longer Virtual event in 2017, and hasn't missed and #NLV since.
I'm so grateful for her friendship, support, and incredibly inspiring way she speaks, lives, and loves.
Learn more about Heather by connecting with her on LinkedIn, visit her website, subscribe to her podcast, and be sure to watch her outstanding TEDx talk. You can also order her best selling book, 7 Intuitive Laws of Employee Loyalty on Amazon.
Episode 122: Storytelling As A Means of Self-Reflection and Change
He looked at his 2 year old son, standing at the foot of the bed where Bryan Falchuck's wife, his son's mother, was wasting away in front of his eyes.
It was that moment when he knew he had to change. To be there for his son in a way he hadn't felt supported as a child, and to be there for his wife in a way he knew she needed, he had to take the steps. Those steps included steps backward, to better understand why he was so compelled to action, so compelled to exploit his anxiety as a tool for professional success.
When Love is a Catalyst for a Shift in Your Story
He looked at his 2 year old son, standing at the foot of the bed where Bryan Falchuck's wife, his son's mother, was wasting away in front of his eyes.
It was that moment when he knew he had to change. To be there for his son in a way he hadn't felt supported as a child, and to be there for his wife in a way he knew she needed, he had to take the steps. Those steps included steps backward, to better understand why he was so compelled to action, so compelled to exploit his anxiety as a tool for professional success.
At a time when money was tight and time was so severely limited, Bryan finally sought help.
It wasn't an overnight shift, following his realization as he looked at his son and wife that day. And he knew it wouldn't be.
He had plenty of evidence of his resilience, persistence, and motivation. As a seriously overweight child and young adult, in his 20s he made the decision to take control of his health and weight and lost 100 lbs. But when his wife got sick and they couldn't find a diagnosis, he regressed and gained 50 of those pounds back.
Bryan took the necessary steps every day to bring himself back to health, and to be the support his wife truly needed.
It's nine years later and he has stayed the course. His wife is mostly recovered, though she continues to battle long-term symptoms of Lyme Disease, and he has written and published two best selling books about his adventure in finding health and happiness in his relationships with himself and others.
What I loved about Bryan's story was that his decision to change wasn't really about him. His decision came from deep love for his family. Being a healthy father and husband meant being a present, compassionate, and supportive father and husband. And that was his motivation. Love.
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Bryan Falchuk is an author, speaker and coach helping people change their lives. Bryan has also been a successful C-level executive. As a Certified Behavior Change Specialist, Bryan is the best-selling author of Do a Day and his latest best-selling book, The 50 75 100 Solution: Build Better Relationships. He speaks regularly on the subjects of motivation, culture, relationships and overcoming challenges, including several TEDx Talks.
He has shared his message on over 150 podcasts and radio shows, and has written for many top publications like Inc Magazine, the LA Times and Chicago Tribune. Bryan also hosts his own show, The Do a Day Podcast.
Visit Bryan's website to learn more, connect with him on LinkedIn, and follow his inspiring work on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.
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Sarah Elkins is a communication coach, keynote speaker, Gallup certified StrengthsFinder coach, professional musician, and author. Her book, Your Stories Don't Define You, How You Tell Them Will is based on lessons from hosting this podcast, and will be available for preorder beginning in early May, 2020.
Episode 99: Motivation Can Be as Simple As Asking Questions
I’ve been asked how I stay motivated, how I keep myself moving forward, and I’ve always had a hard time answering that question. I just go, sometimes to my detriment. In the StrengthsFinder assessment, I can easily see it’s about my top two talents, Strategic and Activator.
Curiosity is the Key
I’ve often been asked how I stay motivated, how I keep myself moving forward, and I’ve always had a hard time answering that question. I just go, sometimes to my detriment. In the StrengthsFinder assessment, I can easily see it’s about my top two talents, Strategic and Activator.
But as I was hiking on the mountain behind my house yesterday, I realized I don’t just GO.
I was breathing hard as I made that first ascent, following my big dog up to the first high point on the mountain, and found it frustrating, really. I take that path multiple times a week, and it is still hard for me, a challenge to keep my pace as my heart pounds and my hips ache. I pushed on up the mountain, thinking that if I didn’t want to go past that first high point, I could take another path down, making a much shorter loop than the one I had originally intended as I left the house.
But I got to that high point, looked out at the small city below me, and pressed on toward the next high point.
Sarah and Toblerone at the summit of Mt. Helena
Again, as my breathing got harder and my legs and hips started to feel the fatigue of the ascent, I told myself I could take the next loop back down and go to my nice, warm house for a cup of hot tea. I also reminded myself that once I started back down the mountain, it wasn’t going to be so much work, and my heart rate would slow. Knowing that, I looked up the path to see a familiar curve, and chose to keep moving up the mountain, eventually getting to the summit.
That mountain is so familiar to me, I generally know what’s around each curve, but I find myself endlessly curious, despite that familiarity. Curious to see what might be around that curve, curious to test myself, my persistence, my fitness level, just curious.
That’s it, I realized, a big part of my motivation is that simple. It’s curiosity.
There are days, blustery and cold, or far too hot and dry, that I get to a high point on the mountain and take the shorter, easier route to go back down, rather than explore, or choose to get to the summit. Those are the days I consider my state of mind and my physical limitations, and my motivation falters. If I didn’t have those days, I wouldn’t be able to relate to my coaching clients. Everyone has those days.
Curiosity is what motivates me, and curiosity can be cultivated. My strengths are my strengths, but curiosity is part of my character, just like resilience and persistence.
What will happen next?
What is my challenge this time?
What will I learn, who will I meet, will I fail or succeed?
What will my impact be, how will this positively effect someone else?
Curiosity about the future, curiosity about myself and my abilities. Now I know how to answer that question about what keeps me motivated on my journey of self-employment, and life in general.
How can you cultivate curiosity?
Ask yourself a question every morning: What beauty will today bring?
Ask yourself a question every time you hesitate to work on a project or face a difficult conversation with someone: What will happen next, when this is complete? What positive impact can I have in this conversation?
Those questions will eventually become part of your daily routine, and will become instinct, creating opportunities for deeper observation and motivation.
If curiosity isn’t what drives you, what makes you move forward with intention, what does? Is it setting and achieving goals? Is it the work itself? Are you motivated by the relationships you build with your time and energy?
Finding out what motivates you is the key to finding satisfaction in your life and relationships. Because when you discover that simple detail about yourself, you can use it with intention to move forward and build the life you want.
This story was originally published on the BizCatalyst 360 multimedia platform.
Come back next week for our 100th episode!
