431 The Art of Aging - Featuring Diane Place
In today’s episode Sarah Elkins and Diane Place discuss the art and beauty in aging and how it allows us to collect amazing stories, learn new things about ourselves, and how we can use these experiences to help others.
431 The Art of Aging - Featuring Diane Place
In today’s episode Sarah Elkins and Diane Place discuss the art and beauty in aging and how it allows us to collect amazing stories, learn new things about ourselves, and how we can use these experiences to help others.
Highlights
Aha moments and how trusting yourself will most often take you to better places in life.
Bringing in other story tellers to enlighten yourself with intergenerational, interracial, and interhuman connections.
Reframing aging and how we perceive aging, in that it is never too late to do anything and you don’t need to step back just because of a number.
The stories we tell ourselves and the stories told around us shape our perceptions, and we need to take active steps to make sure that it is positive and healthy instead of cutting ourselves and others down.
Quotes
“I’ve had “ah ha” moments in my life that led me to make crazy decisions. Some of them didn’t go so well… most of them did because I trusted my heart.”
“Find connections with who we are, not just what we’ve done.”
“We need to seek the new stories if we have some of those old stories. We need to ditch them. We need to erase them, and reinvent them.”
Dear Listeners, now it’s your turn:
What part of this conversation made you realize something about your own aging and maybe your internal messages that are affecting who you are and that you’re modeling and sharing with younger people. If you’re one of the younger listeners, under 50, what part of this conversation made you eager to hear the stories of people around you that you’ve only ever known skin deep? I would love to hear what resonated with you in this conversation.
And, as always, thank you for listening.
About Diane
After 66 years on this planet, I am grateful to have aligned my passions, talents and heart-driven desires in all parts of my life.
After dancing on the edges of my passions throughout my career and my life, the coincidence of three “lightning strike” experiences in 2018 - a cancer diagnosis, shutting down a business venture, empty nesting as I turned 60, compelled me to focus on what I truly wanted to do with my "one wild & precious life."
Fostering connection, learning peoples' stories and creatively inspiring others have always been a personal passion. With Third Act Quest, and our community, the 333 Collective, and my newest program AHA! Third Act Stories — this passion is now front and center. I am working to reframe aging by connecting and inspiring women for their life’s most exciting and meaningful chapter — their “third act.”
My 40-year professional career includes: a decade in Boston with an international ad agency; ten years with America Online (AOL-Time Warner) in the early days of the internet as Senior Vice President; and three entrepreneurial ventures; a cause-marketing firm, Dunbar, Hunter & Associates (bridging corporations and nonprofits around aids, homelessness, domestic violence and breast cancer), WonderBlink Photography, and The Global Design Post.
My favorite quote:
“Tell me, what is it that you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” - Mary Oliver
Be sure to check out Diane’s LinkedIn, and her website Third Act Quest. Plus, check out the Third Act Quest community here, and her YouTube Channel for even more great content.
About Sarah
Sarah is a Montana based workplace communication trainer, TEDx speaker, DisruptHR speaker, public speaking coach, professional storyteller, musician, and podcast host. Her workshops and coaching packages with teams and their leaders are known to address and reduce miscommunication – the most common cause of tension and stress in the workplace. Using the team’s results from the StrengthsFinder assessment, she guides teams in learning to speak each other’s “language”, learning to value each other’s strengths and connecting with each other through enhanced self-reflection and effective listening.
Sarah’s nearly 20 years working in government agencies inspired her to complete her MBA and to achieve her StrengthsFinder certification to improve work environments for others, guiding teams toward increased satisfaction, productivity, and happiness.
Visit her website to purchase her book, Your Stories Don't Define You in paperback or audiobook.
Welcome to the Real World
"Have fun, welcome to the real world!" As if your life as you know it, the here and now, isn't somehow the REAL WORLD?
Our older son is getting ready to graduate from high school. It has not been an easy road for him. We spent a lot of time and money over the years at office supply stores, trying to find tools to help him stay organized and on top of things. Nothing really worked, and as a result, his grades were never stellar. To add to his level of stress over the past few years, our family has experienced a lot of grief, the loss of both of his grandfathers, his step-grandfather, and a very close family friend, all within 3 years. After our most recent loss, a musician who spent a lot of time in our house, I asked how he was feeling:
"I'm ok, mom. I guess I'm just sort of numb at this point."
When people talk about his graduation and the beginning of his "real world" experience, I bristle.
I remember when I was graduating from high school and people said: "Have fun, welcome to the real world!" I also remember being in college and people dismissed my frustrations with comments like "just wait until you get into the REAL WORLD."
It was as if life as I knew it, those years of struggle and growth, somehow didn't qualify as the REAL WORLD.
I can't be the only one who remembers those tween and teen years like they were yesterday. It's not just memories of things that happened or things I did; I have vivid, painful and wonderful memories of how I felt. Those feelings were real. Those struggles were real, some of them more real and more impactful than many experiences since then. Those difficult times, those triumphs and perceived failures were very real to me and continue to shape who I am and who I want to be in the future.
Can you honestly say those years didn't somehow change you? That the personal discoveries and dysfunctional relationships, those physical changes didn't have an impact on who you are today?
The real world is whatever we are experiencing at any given time. I can appreciate that as a young child and teenager my worries were significantly different from the adults around me, but they weren't insignificant. I didn't have to go to a job I might not like for 40+ hours each week; I didn't have to buy my own groceries, toilet paper, and laundry detergent, and I didn't have to worry about rent or mortgage or savings.
My real world then was filled with mean girls, difficult relationships, being a mediocre student (at best), and all the drama that comes with the hormonal fluctuations of a teenager. I wouldn't go back -- there's absolutely no way I would go back to those years.
In different stages of life, I remember observing people older than me and wondering what I would be like at that point in my life. In other stages in my life, I observe people younger than I am, and remember so much of what I was like, what I thought, how I felt, how I behaved. It gives me perspective and helps to remind me to not judge others; I can't possibly know what they're going through, what shaped them.
Maybe if we recognize that each individual has stories that shape us, from toddlers to adults, and that each story is relevant at every point in our lives, we can develop a better sense of how to help each other.
What do you think? Do you remember what it was like to be a teenager and young adult? Did those years feel like real life to you?