379 Leaving The Legacy You Choose
Inevitably, we will be faced with the endless march of time, we will have a moment when we have the thought of how we want people to speak about us when we are gone. Are you making stories that reflect how you want to be remembered? Are you living in a way that solidifies the legacy you want to leave? Do you surround yourself with people who inspire, drive, and temper your ambition?
In todays episode, Sarah Elkins and Bryan Abdul Collins discuss the importance of living a life without regrets, of surrounding ourselves with people that help us be the best versions of ourselves, and living in the moment with those we love.
379 Leaving The Legacy You Choose
Inevitably, we will be faced with the endless march of time, we will have a moment when we have the thought of how we want people to speak about us when we are gone. Are you making stories that reflect how you want to be remembered? Are you living in a way that solidifies the legacy you want to leave? Do you surround yourself with people who inspire, drive, and temper your ambition?
In todays episode, Sarah Elkins and Bryan Abdul Collins discuss the importance of living a life without regrets, of surrounding ourselves with people that help us be the best versions of ourselves, and living in the moment with those we love.
Highlights
Facing the inevitable and considering what it all means.
How much time are you wasting by paying attention to the things that don’t matter?
What is your legacy? What do you want people to think of when they remember you?
What is the evidence of who you were and the stories you carried that you will leave behind?
Quotes
“I just want to teach myself something.”
“I faced the edge of this life and really considered what it all means, and I try to move from that place.”
“Raising your children is your job and your relationship with them afterwards is your performance review.”
“We are living in our own stories.”
“I had to fall in love with the story of who I was becoming.”
Dear Listeners it is now your turn,
You’ve heard our conversation switch back and forth between what we’re doing now to live our legacy, what we want people to know about us, and how we want people to talk about us when we’re gone. We’ve talked about what we bring to the table as coaches and what you need to be looking for in your next coach.
And, as always, thank you for listening.
About Bryan
I am a career and life coach specializing in helping ambitious creatives break through career plateaus and reconnect with their creative expression. I primarily work with mid-to-senior-level professionals in creative services—art directors, designers, creative directors—who are at inflection points in their careers, seeking transitions, feeling stuck, or wanting to deepen their impact while maintaining a sustainable work-life balance.
Through one-on-one strategic conversations, I provide career clarity, direction setting, and personal narrative refinement. With deep empathetic listening, industry expertise, and practical tools, I help clients overcome internal barriers, align their work with their aspirations, and navigate their careers with confidence and purpose.
Be sure to check out Bryan’s LinkedIn, Instagram, and Facebook! As well as his website Poetic State!
About Sarah
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course as well to make sure you nail that next interview!
214: Slowing Down Time - the In-Between
It was in a recent conversation that I realized this about myself, that I am in a constant state of change and churn, and that I sometimes let that get me anxious and stressed. It's silly, since I know I bring this on myself. I could say no. I could turn down opportunities to sing, to speak, to mentor someone. But I love it. I love this feeling of change and growth, and none of the decisions I make are things I don't want to do.
Stories of Mindfulness to Address Uncertainty
Uncertainty Isn’t Always a Bad Thing, We Can Thrive Here
Many years ago, I read a post by Nilofer Merchant about what she calls In-Between Space,
Summers when you were young were the in-between spaces of learning – where you could languish in play time and know learning time was ahead... That time where you got a job offer but hadn’t started yet. Maybe even during the search for a new role. Perhaps it is as simple as when you are clear of a new direction.
I think of that post often; I live in In-Between Space, it's a weird sort of comfort zone for me. I rarely stay content in a job, a dynamic, a relationship. There has to be consistent growth and change in everything I do.
It was in a recent conversation that I realized this about myself, that I am in a constant state of change and churn, and that I sometimes let that get me anxious and stressed. It's silly, since I know I bring this on myself. I could say no. I could turn down opportunities to sing, to speak, to mentor someone. But I love it. I love this feeling of change and growth, and none of the decisions I make are things I don't want to do.
In StrengthsFinder, that is a direct reflection of my Activator and Adaptability talents. If you’re one of those people who struggles in meetings without good facilitation, meetings without a focus on action items, and you find yourself in an almost constant sense of urgency, you may be an Activator, too.
The combination of Activator and Adaptability means I spend a lot more of my days in transition, and a lot fewer of my days in periods of contentedness.
For most of my life that has been a disadvantage. You’ve heard the term “job hopper”, right? When I was starting my career, that was a seriously negative description. People close to me would voice concern every time I changed jobs: “that’ll look bad on your resume!”
But for the past nearly 3 years, this part of my character has been valued, appreciated. People have reached out to me for guidance more than ever. They know if anyone is going to deal with uncertainty with grace and optimism, it’s going to be me - or someone else with Adaptability in their top talents (though they may not know it.)
I realized a few years ago that though it’s not uncommon to find people like me, the majority of people prefer long periods of contentedness and short periods of transition - exactly the opposite to how I live my life.
During a recording of Lois Koffi’s podcast, Healthy-n-Wealthy-n-Wise, Lois asked me about that, how those of us without Adaptability up there in our talents can deal with all of this uncertainty with grace.
That’s where this “in-between space” reference comes in.
For most people, periods of uncertainty are uncomfortable, to say the least. Consider, though, the time between giving your notice at one job and starting the next one. Or the time of your wedding engagement, between the announcement and the event itself. Or pregnancy. Or the summer between school years… all of those are in-between spaces, full of possibility - and uncertainty.
My answer to Lois included two strategies:
1) Your mindset must shift to possibility as opposed to worry. Surround yourself with people who think differently from you, people who have complementary talents. Find an Activator, an Adaptability partner to bring you comfort simply because they will weather this uncertainty storm with optimism and action.
2) Find small routines or habits that bring you a sense of stability and comfort and practice them with intention. When your brain starts to wind up with the negative “what ifs”, practice looking for things that are certain, things that - even if they’re not great - are consistent in your life. This is what mindfulness is all about: Being fully present, in the moment. Tell yourself “right now, in this moment, I am breathing, I am sitting here with consciousness.” This isn’t just about gratitude, though that’s really helpful in this context, it’s about knowing what’s certain in a given moment. Here’s one of mine: “I’m certain that right now, in this moment, I’m safe, I’m warm, I’m not hungry, and my dog is peacefully sleeping beside me.”
When we acknowledge and value our in-between time, we are able to process a past experience and begin to consider the potential for our future.
If you have children or fur-babies, it’s a great way to slow down time so you don’t regret missing out on the limited years we get to spend with them.
When planning our wedding 25 years ago, I kept a journal to document all the details. I knew that by embracing and enjoying each part of the journey, I would slow down the time before the actual wedding day. I also figured that this strategy would help with the emotional let-down following a major event.
To slow down time, I need to stop thinking of each day as stressful or uncertain, stop trying to make something happen every moment, and start thinking about each day as an opportunity to enjoy the journey leading to whatever is next.
Are you an In-Between Space person, too? Do you embrace that side of you, or does it keep you frustrated and anxious?
Thank you for listening to the Your Stories Don’t Define You podcast!
There are still spots available for the fifth No Longer Virtual Conference coming up March 3rd and 4th, 2022 in Park City, Utah. Bringing entrepreneurs and innovators together in a small venue, limited to 40 people, to #connectbeyondthekeyboard, to learn from each other and grow in our personal and professional lives. Visit elkinsconsulting.com for more details and to view the fabulous agenda.
Are you facing a transition right now? A big birthday coming up, considering a major career change, retirement? Empty nesting or divorce?
Are you overwhelmed with the millions of opportunities that seem to be opening in our global community? Not sure where to start, what questions to ask yourself, and questioning what you’re even qualified for?
If you’re eager to start exploring and would appreciate a guide, my recently launched Discovering Clarity course is available now for just $149. I highly recommend that you register with a friend or group of friends to keep each other accountable, message me for a discount code for multiple registrations. Visit elkins consulting.com / discovering-clarity.
My friend Trent said this to me a few years ago: Hope is not a strategy.
Instead of "I hope this year is better" say "this year will be better." And then take steps to MAKE it better. In my work I call it planting seeds. Every day that my motivation drops I ask myself which seeds I can plant right. this. minute. to improve my future. I make myself choose two seeds, one for future income and one for the health of an important relationship. It's really amazing how much can change by simply taking small steps. But nothing changes if you say "I hope 2022 is better than 2021" and then do nothing to make that happen. What seeds will you plant today?
212: Micro Adjustments For The Win
Most of us would like to improve ourselves- the way we are viewed by others and the inner voice in our head that guides us to decisions.
During this episode, you will learn more about how small things can make a huge difference. Listen in as Sarah shares her stories, the small adjustments that lead to bigger changes in her relationships with family and friends.
Want A Change In Your Life? Make Small Adjustments to Shift Your Story
Most of us would like to improve ourselves- the way we are viewed by others and the inner voice in our head that guides us to decisions.
During this episode, you will learn more about how small things can make a huge difference. Listen in as Sarah shares her stories, the small adjustments that lead to bigger changes in her relationships with family and friends.
Tune in to begin your journey towards your authentic self.
Discovering Clarity One Bite at a Time course is now available!
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
211: Authenticity is Overrated
"Authenticity isn’t a static fixed thing. We grow, we transform, we collect people and information throughout our lives that influence our identity. Sometimes dramatically, sometimes in more subtle ways."
Choose your identity and grow into it
Do you believe the statements about yourself that you tell others? Do they fit you now, or are they labels from your past?
In today’s episode, Sarah dives into the topic of authenticity- or rather what that looks like for each individual and the power it gives for personal growth and transformation. Sarah also shares her own story of genuineness, the change of a label from her teenage stage to a self-employed communication coach with her own podcast.
Tune in to begin your journey towards your authentic self, wherever that may lead you.
"Authenticity isn’t a static fixed thing. We grow, we transform, we collect people and information throughout our lives that influence our identity. Sometimes dramatically, sometimes in more subtle ways."
Discovering Clarity One Bite at a Time course is now available!
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
210: Your Strengths Are Your Stories, Tell Them With Confidence and Intention
Hey friends, happy new year to you!
I have a feeling 2022 will be a big year for all of us, a good feeling in fact, that we will make some magic happen this year.
Listen to the latest episode of Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will in which Sarah discusses how you can use your natural talents to be successful and stay motivated.
Using Your Natural Talents to Guide You in Your Work and Relationships
Hey friends, happy new year to you!
I have a feeling 2022 will be a big year for all of us, a good feeling in fact, that we will make some magic happen this year.
Listen to the latest episode of Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will in which Sarah discusses how you can use your natural talents to be successful and stay motivated.
Discovering Clarity One Bite at a Time course is now available!
"I remind them [clients] that they’ll get from point A to point B one way or another. They may as well use their natural talents rather than trying to do it how someone else would do it."
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
About Sarah:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
209: Transition and Transformation Are Painful, Recruit a Guide
Just in time for the New Year, join in with Sarah Elkins as she talks about her change over the past few years- from someone with a draining job to happily self-employed. Sarah shares the steps and activities she learned along the way that assisted in developing her own “satisfying menu”.
Find Clarity, One Bite At A Time
What does it take for you to transform and discover your strengths?
Just in time for the New Year, join in with Sarah Elkins as she talks about her change over the past few years- from someone with a draining job to happily self-employed. Sarah shares the steps and activities she learned along the way that assisted in developing her own “satisfying menu”.
Tune in to hear more about Sarah’s journey, as well as the new course she will be offering on finding clarity.
“That exercise eventually lead me to where I am now. Happily self-employed with incredibly rewarding impactful work.”
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Bicentennial Episode! An Accidental Podcaster Reaches Her 200th Episode
Hundreds of stories, people from all over the world, and life-changing conversations all have to lead to this special 200th episode of the "Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will" podcast.
Sarah Elkins and her good friend, Neil Hughes, look back to the beginning of the podcast’s creation and the unexpected moments and lessons that emerged.
Sarah Elkins and Neil Hughes:
Origin Stories of Podcasts and Friendship
Hundreds of stories, people from all over the world, and life-changing conversations all have to lead to this special 200th episode of the "Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will" podcast.
Sarah Elkins and her good friend, Neil Hughes, look back to the beginning of the podcast’s creation and the unexpected moments and lessons that emerged.
Tune in to hear more about the happy accidents and people that contribute to something bigger than yourself.
“If you’re open, the universe will nudge you in the right direction.”
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
About Neil:
Neil Hughes is a tech columnist, best-selling author, LinkedIn top voice, freelance writer, ghostwriter, tech blogger, podcast host, and podcast producer.
Visit Neil’s website and follow him on LinkedIn!
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.