"People's lives are largely a product of the decisions they make."
The theme throughout this conversation is self-reflection. When we understand ourselves, and can reflect on how we're showing up to the people and environment around us, we can make decisions in alignment with our ideals, our ideal vision of who we want to be and how we want to be.
Ron wasn't always as self-reflective as he is now, it is something he learned as a result of difficult relationships. At some point he realized that if he wanted healthy, loving relationships, he was going to have to be a person who earned them, a person who learned from his mistakes.
It was a process, becoming a self-listener. Ron learned to take a step back after conversations to reflect on how they went, the good and the bad, and what he might have done right or what he could have done better. Eventually he started taking that step back during conversations, rather than waiting until afterward, so he could see where he was going and make necessary adjustments either to shift the conversation in a more positive direction, or recognize when it was time to cut and run.
It was tempting to hunker down and immediately get to work, even though I knew I wouldn't be inspired or productive, mostly spinning my wheels and finding opportunities for distraction.
Instead, I forced myself to put on my hiking boots and take the dog for a long walk. I knew if I could get myself outside for a little while, I'd be far more productive for the rest of the day.
I was right.
Meg Nocero worked as a prosecuting attorney for 20 years. She saw every kind of human in that work, and yes, after a while the job might have contributed to trust issues.
Michael sat with his mother when she went to the hospital for breast cancer treatment appointments. He was struck by the compassionate care of her doctors, the fact that they treated her with dignity, kindness, and as if she was far more than a patient or a diagnosis.
He was in high school at the time, and had all kinds of ideas about what he wanted for his future. That experience, though, gave him the inspiration and motivation he needed, and he signed up for pre-med classes the following semester.
This week’s episode of the podcast is a sneak peek of the audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will, to be released in mid-November. For a limited time, the ebook is just $0.99!
As a special bonus for listeners, the book will include two songs recorded by my band, Spare Change, in my living room in Montana. Keep an eye out for announcements through LinkedIn and via my Elkins Consulting Facebook & Instagram pages, or visit my website to learn more.
It was one of at least a dozen stories like it that my aunt, my father’s sister, told me when she visited. Each of her stories would start with something like “when we moved and needed to…, we met the nicest person!”
My uncle, who is far less exuberantly friendly, would shake his head, and with a small smile on his face he mumbled: “You always say that.”
