Your Stories Don’t Define You
How You Tell Them Will
A podcast to unlock your stories and uncover meaningful insights.
Episode 195: The Shame Doctor's Gift
John Dunia didn’t become the Shame Doctor overnight. His journey from a junior high kid discovering his love for music to releasing his first book took years, and the struggle of his 22-year-old marriage falling apart was a catalyst in his personal growth and professional career shift.
He found writing his novel was a time to self-reflect and contemplate the experiences that brought him to where he is today, and believed that sharing those experiences could guide others to find relief from self-doubt and anger.
Stories of Shame and How it Differs from Guilt
John Dunia image and quote podcast cover art
John Dunia didn’t become the Shame Doctor overnight. His journey from a junior high kid discovering his love for music to releasing his first book took years, and the struggle of his 22-year-old marriage falling apart was a catalyst in his personal growth and professional career shift.
He found writing his novel was a time to self-reflect and contemplate the experiences that brought him to where he is today, and believed that sharing those experiences could guide others to find relief from self-doubt and anger.
The moments that sparked the passion in John’s life are something we all have encountered whether we realize it or not.
John Dunia book cover image and quote for podcast cover art
For John, one of those moments was listening to Switched-on-Bach in high school, an encounter that changed the course of his life. For John, different experiences, from meeting with a therapist to listening to his friend’s older brother’s music, influenced the way he perceived the world.
Today’s podcast episode starts with John’s stories about being a band teacher. This is the beginning to the discussion about John’s life and the moments that brought him clarity.
About John:
John Dunia is the author of “Shame on Me”, a Principle at Shamedoctor.com, and a public speaker helping others find their purpose. John is also an ambassador for HumansFirst, a featured writer & columnist for BIZCATALYST 360°, and a sales representative for several companies.
John attended California State University with a Bachelor’s degree in Music Performance. He also attended Pasadena City College.
Visit John's website, take his self assessment, and follow John on LinkedIn and Facebook to learn more!
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
Image of Sarah Elkins and her dog, Toby, with Elkins Consulting logo and StrengthsFinder logo
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
194: There are Three Parts to Our Lives, and One is Undercover
She grew up in a solidly middle class household with little exposure to the underbelly of her community. As an undercover cop posing as a prostitute, Diane Halfman got a quick and unlikely education about that world.
She had to learn to trust her instincts and own her space, her power, and her current coaching clients get the benefit of her knowledge and experience doing just that.
Diane Halfman: Stories from Undercover
Diane Halfman quote and image, podcast cover art
She grew up in a solidly middle class household with little exposure to the underbelly of her community. As an undercover cop posing as a prostitute, Diane Halfman got a quick and unlikely education about that world.
She had to learn to trust her instincts and own her space, her power, and her current coaching clients get the benefit of her knowledge and experience doing just that.
Our conversations shifted between her experience tracking a serial killer undercover to her "ah ha" moment with a former boyfriend as she navigated a kidnapping ordeal with a friend. Diane shared intimate stories of how she became the powerful, insightful coach she is today, and why what she does matters not only to her clients, but to the circle of community her clients will influence.
Diane Halfman image and quote, podcast cover art
When you've listened to this episode of Your Stories Don't Define You, it may take a few days to fully process what you've heard. And when you do, you'll want to follow her work, subscribe to her podcast, and connect with her through her social media platforms.
Consultant, Trainer and Podcaster, Diane Halfman, utilizes her survival instincts from her work as an undercover prostitute to empower business leaders to move through crisis, manage boundaries and to not second guess yourself. She is the host of the Live Your SPAlife podcast. The SPA in SPAlife stands for Seek Power Always - that power within you to do your deeper work in the world.
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 193: Hillary Johns "It's an Honor and a Privilege to be a Lawyer"
"I consider our country as a whole" is how Hillary Johns explains her appreciation and love for the variety of experiences our country offers. As a bi-coastal attorney, Hillary explores everything from entertainment law, civil litigation, business law, torts, employment law, to outdoors activities like hiking and camping, and even volunteers to work with animals.
Stories from a Multi-Faceted Attorney
*This episode was recorded while Hillary was in-transit, sound quality is limited.*
Hillary Johns quote and image for podcast cover art
"I consider our country as a whole" is how Hillary Johns explains her appreciation and love for the variety of experiences our country offers. As a bi-coastal attorney, Hillary explores everything from entertainment law, civil litigation, business law, torts, employment law, to outdoors activities like hiking and camping, and even volunteers to work with animals.
We spoke of the need for people who work hard in one aspect of their lives to take breaks and have hobbies complete outside of that particular work environment.
Hillary Johns image and quote for podcast cover art
It can be surprising to hear what people choose in that way, from fostering older shelter animals, to beadworking and fly fishing.
Hillary's career has taken some interesting twists and turns that I'm sure listeners will find inspiring and fascinating.
About Hillary Johns
Hillary Johns is a member of the Time’s Up Legal Defense Fund. She works with the American Bar Association to provide legal services to military personnel. Ms. Johns has also served as a pro bono attorney and volunteer for local, statewide and national domestic violence organizations. She is a past alumni committee chair and current student mentor with Occidental College. She is a member of the Beverly Hills Bar Association and the Beverly Hills Chamber of Commerce.
Outside of her legal career, Ms. Johns was a competitive ranked soccer player and professional athlete. She is a licensed competitive youth soccer coach, and coaches youth soccer. Her interests include European and American history, competitive sports, fitness for people of all ages, and animal rights.
Episode 192: Authenticity Doesn't Mean Rigid
It was his search for happiness that took him down the road of dramatic changes in his eating, his thoughts about exercise, and his idea to start a podcast.
Trey Kauffman was on a mission, and it didn't take long, or very many episodes, really, for him to realize that happiness was the wrong goal. He had to search for meaning first. And when he gradually adjusted his mindset, his epiphany occurred: He could be happy with exactly what he had in his life in that moment, partly because everything he had and everything he was doing had meaning.
Some People Take an All or Nothing Approach to Change
Trey Kauffman and The Mosaic Life Podcast
Podcast cover art, Trey Kauffman image and quote
It was his search for happiness that took him down the road of dramatic changes in his eating, his thoughts about exercise, and his idea to start a podcast.
Trey Kauffman was on a mission, and it didn't take long, or very many episodes, really, for him to realize that happiness was the wrong goal. He had to search for meaning first. And when he gradually adjusted his mindset, his epiphany occurred: He could be happy with exactly what he had in his life in that moment, partly because everything he had and everything he was doing had meaning.
You are going to love this episode.
Podcast cover art, Trey Kauffman image and quote
Here are the links I promised:
Ernie Welsh, co-host for first 50 episodes. Aka Jimmy Suspect and his new EP, Bad News
Shawn Wells, genius in biomechanics and brain chemistry – episode 84, book title: The Energy Formula
Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer
The Scientist and the Spy – about espionage in the agricultural industry
Cynthia Garcia – first guest of 2021. She had such an amazing story, a difficult childhood, now is a celebrity nutritionist. Her message: We are fully capable of transforming our stories.
Ryan Holiday, author of Ego is the Enemy and Stoicism
Want to learn more about Trey? Check out his website, follow him on Instagram, keep up with his work on Facebook, and be sure to connect with him on LinkedIn.
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
Image of Sarah Elkins with dog, Elkins Consulting logo and Gallup StrengthsFinder logo
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 191: After Happily Ever After, a Novel by Leslie Rasmussen That Hits Home
Leslie Rasmussen didn't intend to write a novel. Her idea was to interview people in their 40s, empty-nesting or nearly empty nesting, in long-term relationships or newly divorced, hearing their stories and finding commonalities in order to write a non-fiction book for people to find comfort in these transitions.
She found so many commonalities that she decided to combine the patterns she was hearing about to write the stories of one fictional family's experience.
This story resonates because it feels so familiar. Every character is familiar, from the teenaged daughter to the high achieving best friend. The primary protagonist is me. She's you. She's your husband or your wife. Though her actions and how she chooses to move through her current situation won't exactly match what you might do, the feelings and circumstances absolutely will.
We Have a Lot More in Common Than We Think
Leslie Rasmussen podcast episode cover art.
Leslie Rasmussen didn't intend to write a novel. Her idea was to interview people in their 40s, empty-nesting or nearly empty nesting, in long-term relationships or newly divorced, hearing their stories and finding commonalities in order to write a non-fiction book for people to find comfort in these transitions.
She found so many commonalities that she decided to combine the patterns she was hearing about to write the stories of one fictional family's experience.
This story resonates because it feels so familiar. Every character is familiar, from the teenaged daughter to the high achieving best friend. The primary protagonist is me. She's you. She's your husband or your wife. Though her actions and how she chooses to move through her current situation won't exactly match what you might do, the feelings and circumstances absolutely will.
Our conversation began with movie trivia... it turns out that Leslie started her career in Los Angeles as an actress. After her cameo appearance in a major film, she had an epiphany about what she really wanted, which was to be involved in filmmaking, but not necessarily as an actress.
Follow Leslie on Facebook, Instagram, and be sure to grab your copy of her book, After Happily Ever After.
From Leslie's website:
Leslie A. Rasmussen was born and raised in Los Angeles, California. She graduated with a bachelors from UCLA in Communications and went on to write television comedies for Gerald McRaney, Burt Reynolds, Roseanne Barr, Norm McDonald, Drew Carey, and Ralph Macchio as well as The Wild Thornberrys and Sweet Valley High. Later, she earned a master’s degree in nutrition and ran her own business for ten years. Most recently, Leslie has written personal essays for online magazines such as Huffington Post, Maria Shriver and Sheknows. Leslie loves dogs and besides having two adorable Labradors, she volunteers at The Burbank Animal Shelter, in Burbank, California. Leslie lives in Los Angeles and has two sons, and a husband she’s been with since college.
This is her debut novel.
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 190: Terre Roche and Her Accidental Music Career
It seems ridiculous now, imagining parents of a 17 year old agreeing to send her on a road trip across the country with her 18 year old sister to perform their music at small venues, mostly on college campuses.
But that's exactly what Terre & Maggie Roche's parents did. Terre's father even met with the principal of her high school where she was supposed to be for her senior year and negotiated her school work and exams to be completed in between their 6-week touring dates.
Believe It or Not, Touring the Country at 17 Isn't the Beginning of Her Story
It seems ridiculous now, imagining parents of a 17 year old agreeing to send her on a road trip across the country with her 18 year old sister to perform their music at small venues, mostly on college campuses.
Terre Roche image and quote for podcast cover art
But that's exactly what Terre & Maggie Roche's parents did. Terre's father even met with the principal of her high school where she was supposed to be for her senior year and negotiated her school work and exams to be completed in between their 6-week touring dates.
Terre spent her 18th birthday in Spearfish, South Dakota. They were contracted for a performance in Missoula, Montana, next, and their car broke down in Billings, Montana. They grabbed their gear and hitchhiked to Missoula so they wouldn't break their contract.
The biggest surprise to me was when Terre said being a musician was never her big dream, she sort of fell into the job.
As pre-teens, Terre and her sister had been watching a video series to learn to play guitar, and made up new lyrics to a popular song for a local politician's candidacy and fundraising party. A variety of other candidates were in attendance and asked them to do the same thing for their parties. Eventually they were performing for the Governor's parties and caught the attention of a touring company.
Ready to listen in? Great. Here are some links we promised for you:
Terre Roche image and quote for podcast cover art
Down the Dream (from the Seductive Reasoning album)
Elana James, Hot Club of Cow Town, Montana-based band, Terre Roche loves these guys!
From her website:
Terre Roche is a singer, songwriter, guitar player, teacher, author, innkeeper and founding member of the trio "The Roches". She has performed in many clubs and concert halls throughout the US and Europe and appeared on numerous TV shows over the course of her 45 year career.
She's a member of the band "Afro-Jersey" and co-creator with jazz pianist Garry Dial of "Us an'Them", a collection of national anthems from 16 nations. Her composition "Star of Wonder" has become a favorite repertoire piece in choirs around the world.
At the other end of the spectrum Terre shrieked her way to modest cult status as the voice on Robert Fripp's album "Exposure". She sang the role of Squeaky Fromme in John Moran's avant-garde opera "The Manson Family". Terre is the author of "Blabbermouth", a memoir about her surprising journey coming of age as a female musician in the 1970's.
She's worked with Paul Simon, Philip Glass, Linda Ronstadt, Meredith Monk, Don Was, The Muscle Shoals Swampers, Robert Fripp, Tracey Ullman, Kathy Mattea and Garry Dial among others.
Elkins Consulting logo plus image of Sarah and her dog, and Gallup StrengthsFinder logo
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 189: Podcast Brief 3 - Ideation & Adaptability Gain Momentum
In this week’s episode I’ll round out a description of my top five talents with Ideation and Adaptability. Ideation being the one that I imagine as a hamster on a wheel in my head, constantly running, coming up with ideas about what I’ll do next, ideas to solve problems, sometimes completely random ideas about why things happen the way they do, how things work (usually unrelated to anything that actually matters in my life), and how to express concepts so they’re sticky and/or persuasive.
Adaptability is the talent that allows me to switch gears easily, and that makes me a good person to be around when a project goes sideways.
StrengthFinder Results Can Bring Clarity to Your Communication Patterns of Friction
Podcast brief 3 – Ideation / Adaptability
Podcast cover art with image and quote from Sarah Elkins
This week’s episode of Your Stories Don’t Define You is part 3 of a series I’m exploring to clarify how StrengthsFinder results can provide clarity around your life's patterns.
Two weeks ago I shared what it’s like to have Command in your top talents using the StrengthsFinder assessment, and last week I shared stories about my top two talents, Strategic & Activator: how they used to look to me, what they look like now in my life, and some of the strategies I use so they work for me instead of against me.
As a Gallup certified StrengthsFinder coach, I’ve taken opportunities to work with other coaches for two reasons, one is that I believe in this stuff, the idea that when we understand our own way of thinking, our natural, instinctive talents, and when we understand where we might be getting in our own way, we find more satisfaction in our lives. Another reason is that to be a coach and to have a coach demonstrates my belief that this works, that working with a good coach adds value. I know that the more I know about my own talents and blind spots, the more effective I can be for my clients.
Image of a hamster running in a wheel.
In this week’s episode I’ll round out a description of my top five talents with Ideation and Adaptability. Ideation being the one that I imagine as a hamster on a wheel in my head, constantly running, coming up with ideas about what I’ll do next, ideas to solve problems, sometimes completely random ideas about why things happen the way they do, how things work (usually unrelated to anything that actually matters in my life), and how to express concepts so they’re sticky and/or persuasive.
Adaptability is the talent that allows me to switch gears easily, and that makes me a good person to be around when a project goes sideways.
My top five talents combined; Strategic, Activator, Ideation, Command, and Adaptability are what make me great at what I do, they’re also the things that get me into trouble when I’m not using them with intention. When I look back at the experiences of significant friction in my life, I now know part of why they happened, how I contributed to my own struggles, and maybe ways I could have done things a little differently.
It doesn’t help, necessarily, to think about the “what ifs” directly, I like to think of it more as identifying patterns so I can make changes in my responses & reactions when similar situations appear, which happens a lot.
When I was 18 and struggling in a job, I told my mother I was thinking of quitting.
“Sarah, if you quit now, this same scenario will come up over and over again until you learn the lesson you’re supposed to learn from it. It’ll be different people, but a very similar struggle.”
I stayed, and yes, I did learn a lot from the experience. I was proud of myself for sticking it out, I felt strong, resilient, and ready for the next challenge.
Though I learned a lot about myself and the world around me in that job, it took another 20 years to truly uncover the pattern that began to emerge that year. That’s the beauty of self-reflection: When you uncover negative patterns from your past, you can begin to change them for your future.
Prior to about 2015, if you changed jobs more than twice in a 5 year period, you were considered a “job hopper”, which made hiring managers pretty uncomfortable when they looked at your resume. In the 2020s, between the lack of consistency in industries and the gig economy making waves, we’re seeing a much needed change in that way of thinking. Maybe I was just ahead of my time…
It wasn’t until I saw my results in the StrengthsFinder assessment, with Adaptability in large, bold font on the report, that I understood my self-created label of being a “2 to 3 year employee.”
When a job lasted longer than that, I can see in my rearview that the job shifted often enough to keep me moving, motivated, and interested. For instance, when I worked as a software consultant, implementing large-scale HR programs, the longest contract I was on lasted 14 months, and then my company would move me onto a new client project.
Many years later I was a compliance officer for a Federal grant - and I don’t even like rules. Looking back, I know why I applied for the job – to get more financial skills to round out my business experiences after completing my MBA – but I have no idea why they hired me or why I accepted the position.
The first few weeks were spent reading the rules related to the grant, reporting requirements, and everything I could get my hands on to make sure I understood all the strings attached to the 2+ million dollars that would be moving through our project.
The next few weeks were spent with that hamster in my head that I mentioned, constantly coming up with ideas about how to collect the required data from our 44 sub-grantees, how to manage our budget, and how to make sure our sub-grantees understood their role in compliance.
Using Microsoft Access, I created a robust database for data collection and budget management. I created easy to use forms to enter data, using drop down boxes, radio buttons, and select fields as much as possible to limit typos and errors in formatting.
Looking back, I can easily see how my top strengths made me successful in that position, despite being in a job that wasn’t a great fit, and with a boss with significantly different motivation and perspectives on work and management.
When I look back now, I realize I knew two things when I started, even though I didn’t think intentionally about them at the time:
1) To ensure compliance from our sub-grantees, I needed to have strong, positive relationships with them. They must WANT to be compliant, rather than HAVE TO be compliant to make this work smoothly and get the most positive impact out of the investments we were making.
2) I needed structures and processes that made sense in collecting data, managing the budget, and creating required, accurate reports, because I knew myself well enough to know that once I got into maintenance mode, I was unlikely to be as good at managing details.
I mentioned the boss & I had some friction… This is what happens when your strengths are significantly different from others in your team, and communication styles aren’t addressed early in the relationships.
My mouse hovered over the send button.
The email message was pointed—direct—and I felt strongly that these words needed to be shared with my boss and a director of the agency. But I hesitated as my mouse hovered.
I had felt lethargic throughout the weekend. From the time I left the office on Friday evening until Tuesday morning, I couldn’t shake this lack of motivation. A few minutes after I sat down at my desk on that Tuesday morning, I looked up at my calendar, and the lightbulb in my head went on. Monday had been my two-year anniversary at that job.
When I left my previous position, I made a “deal-breaker” list. It was basically my top priorities for my next job. A micromanaging, cruel boss was at the top of my list of deal breakers. Next was my workspace. An internal cubical, small and without windows, was also a deal breaker. There were a few others, but those were the big ones.
As I walked into the building for my third interview, and was shown to what would be my third-floor office with huge windows and a fantastic view, I knew this would be mine. And here I was, exactly two years later, feeling lethargic and sad despite this phenomenal view from my desk.
I shifted the mouse pointer away from the send button and reread the message.
A memory from my previous position floated to the front of my brain.
My mouse pointer had hovered dangerously over the send button two+ years prior at my previous job. I absolutely knew this message was likely to create drama with my boss. I rationalized hitting the send button: “It’s a reasonable thing to forward. I’m not doing anything wrong.”
I totally underestimated the drama, and seconds after I hit the button, my boss was next to my desk, her voice rising in pitch and volume.
I blushed, angry at the overreaction and embarrassed at the attention she was drawing to our cubicle, as I tried to explain why I sent the email. Nothing I said made a difference, and she stomped away from me, furious.
A few minutes later, as I was walking around the building to get some fresh air and perspective, it dawned on me. I totally earned that embarrassment. I poked the bear. I knew I was going to poke the bear. I knew I was antagonizing her when I hit the send button on that message. No matter how rational and reasonable the content of that message, I knew I was stirring up trouble and I did it anyway.
Why?
At that point in my job, I was in maintenance mode. I had set up systems to manage reporting and compliance, and most of my days were spent reviewing spreadsheets and building reports based on the data I was collecting. It was relatively quiet for our team that week, and I was probably bored, so I sabotaged myself.
Fast-forward two years later as my mouse pointer hovered over the send button, my memory of the other experience vivid and ready to be applied. I stopped myself. I reflected. I was bored, and I was about to sabotage myself . . . again.
I realized that if I was bored, it was up to me to find a more constructive way to address it. In that job, I had a lot of autonomy and freedom to work on projects, so I took some time to think about what I wanted to learn more about, what projects would truly benefit the organization and our community, and those I could persuade my boss and other leaders in the organization to support and implement. Making a list and starting to carefully word my next proposal, I saved that email message for another time, and as a reminder to avoid sabotaging myself again.
Now that you know how my Strategic, Activator, Ideation, Command, and Adaptability show up, you could probably pinpoint exactly where they served me well, and where they didn’t in my past.
Without being conscious of my top talents, I can be very good at what I do, but there will always be a limit to my growth. Not only because I’m not practicing with intention to grow my use of those talents, but because I would be unaware of the ways my talents are creating unnecessary obstacles and struggles.
The only way we grow as humans, the only way we can truly find satisfaction in our relationships, is to be self-reflective. This is not the same as being hyper critical of ourselves!
Being self-reflective means understanding our role in every situation, in every relationship. What am I doing to move this conversation in a positive direction? What was my role in the conflict with my coworker? What natural talents am I using in ways that are positive, and where am I getting in my own way?
Please send me a message if you enjoyed this series of podcast briefs! If they were useful to listeners, I’ll do another series in the future.
Next week’s episode of the Your Stories Don’t Define You podcast features Terre Roche, vocalist and guitar player famous for her performances with her sister and their band The Roches! Hearing her stories of touring across the country at 17 years old, her love for music, and her accidental career will inspire you to look at your life in a different way. Don’t miss it!
ABOUT SARAH:
Elkins Consulting logo with image of Sarah and her dog.
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.