366 Fortunes For The Future
Throughout our lives we will have to wear many hats and perform many tasks on our paths toward success and personal fulfillment, sometimes these wayward paths lead us to doors that we would never expect to come across. We only need to have the courage to reach out and open the door.
In this episode Sarah Elkins and Russel Rowland discuss the many different paths life leads us down and the lessons we learn on our way to fulfillment and success.
366 Fortunes For The Future
Throughout our lives we will have to wear many hats and perform many tasks on our paths toward success and personal fulfillment, sometimes these wayward paths lead us to doors that we would never expect to come across. We only need to have the courage to reach out and open the door.
In this episode Sarah Elkins and Russel Rowland discuss the many different paths life leads us down and the lessons we learn on our way to fulfillment and success.
Highlights
The work we find between our desired career can open many doors you could never expect.
We need to have something or someone show us that what we’re doing matters.
We all have an edge of discomfort in putting ourselves out there, but we have to confront it in order to live a fulfilling life.
Quotes
“I’m not a big believer of hiding the skeletons. I think you have to look at your history honestly in order to keep growing and learning about how we become the people we are.”
“It’s really the main piece of advice that I think all writers need is to keep doing it. Because we all have an imposter syndrome, every single one of us.”
Dear Listeners it is now your turn,
I already gave you a really fun exercise, if you find that you’re blocked in the writing you need to do, whether that be business writing, or a blog, or journal, maybe you’re writing a book, if you’re feeling blocked in your creativity try writing a handful of fortunes that you would want to find or that you would want somebody you care about to find in their next fortune cookie.
And, as always, thank you for listening.
About Russel
Russell Rowland is the acclaimed author of seven books, as well as the host of a radio show, Fifty-Six Counties, on Yellowstone Public Radio. He has also hosted two podcasts, Breakfast in Montana and The State of Montana, and will soon launch a new podcast, THE SONG OF ROWLAND: American Culture at Full Volume, where he will be interviewing creative people from around the country about their process and the importance of culture in America today. Russell has an MA in Creative Writing from Boston University and lives in Billings, Montana.
Be sure to check out Russels’s Facebook, LinkedIn, and Instagram! As well as his Website, subscribe to his Newsletter, and his Bluesky account!
About Sarah
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course as well to make sure you nail that next interview!
214: Slowing Down Time - the In-Between
It was in a recent conversation that I realized this about myself, that I am in a constant state of change and churn, and that I sometimes let that get me anxious and stressed. It's silly, since I know I bring this on myself. I could say no. I could turn down opportunities to sing, to speak, to mentor someone. But I love it. I love this feeling of change and growth, and none of the decisions I make are things I don't want to do.
Stories of Mindfulness to Address Uncertainty
Uncertainty Isn’t Always a Bad Thing, We Can Thrive Here
Many years ago, I read a post by Nilofer Merchant about what she calls In-Between Space,
Summers when you were young were the in-between spaces of learning – where you could languish in play time and know learning time was ahead... That time where you got a job offer but hadn’t started yet. Maybe even during the search for a new role. Perhaps it is as simple as when you are clear of a new direction.
I think of that post often; I live in In-Between Space, it's a weird sort of comfort zone for me. I rarely stay content in a job, a dynamic, a relationship. There has to be consistent growth and change in everything I do.
It was in a recent conversation that I realized this about myself, that I am in a constant state of change and churn, and that I sometimes let that get me anxious and stressed. It's silly, since I know I bring this on myself. I could say no. I could turn down opportunities to sing, to speak, to mentor someone. But I love it. I love this feeling of change and growth, and none of the decisions I make are things I don't want to do.
In StrengthsFinder, that is a direct reflection of my Activator and Adaptability talents. If you’re one of those people who struggles in meetings without good facilitation, meetings without a focus on action items, and you find yourself in an almost constant sense of urgency, you may be an Activator, too.
The combination of Activator and Adaptability means I spend a lot more of my days in transition, and a lot fewer of my days in periods of contentedness.
For most of my life that has been a disadvantage. You’ve heard the term “job hopper”, right? When I was starting my career, that was a seriously negative description. People close to me would voice concern every time I changed jobs: “that’ll look bad on your resume!”
But for the past nearly 3 years, this part of my character has been valued, appreciated. People have reached out to me for guidance more than ever. They know if anyone is going to deal with uncertainty with grace and optimism, it’s going to be me - or someone else with Adaptability in their top talents (though they may not know it.)
I realized a few years ago that though it’s not uncommon to find people like me, the majority of people prefer long periods of contentedness and short periods of transition - exactly the opposite to how I live my life.
During a recording of Lois Koffi’s podcast, Healthy-n-Wealthy-n-Wise, Lois asked me about that, how those of us without Adaptability up there in our talents can deal with all of this uncertainty with grace.
That’s where this “in-between space” reference comes in.
For most people, periods of uncertainty are uncomfortable, to say the least. Consider, though, the time between giving your notice at one job and starting the next one. Or the time of your wedding engagement, between the announcement and the event itself. Or pregnancy. Or the summer between school years… all of those are in-between spaces, full of possibility - and uncertainty.
My answer to Lois included two strategies:
1) Your mindset must shift to possibility as opposed to worry. Surround yourself with people who think differently from you, people who have complementary talents. Find an Activator, an Adaptability partner to bring you comfort simply because they will weather this uncertainty storm with optimism and action.
2) Find small routines or habits that bring you a sense of stability and comfort and practice them with intention. When your brain starts to wind up with the negative “what ifs”, practice looking for things that are certain, things that - even if they’re not great - are consistent in your life. This is what mindfulness is all about: Being fully present, in the moment. Tell yourself “right now, in this moment, I am breathing, I am sitting here with consciousness.” This isn’t just about gratitude, though that’s really helpful in this context, it’s about knowing what’s certain in a given moment. Here’s one of mine: “I’m certain that right now, in this moment, I’m safe, I’m warm, I’m not hungry, and my dog is peacefully sleeping beside me.”
When we acknowledge and value our in-between time, we are able to process a past experience and begin to consider the potential for our future.
If you have children or fur-babies, it’s a great way to slow down time so you don’t regret missing out on the limited years we get to spend with them.
When planning our wedding 25 years ago, I kept a journal to document all the details. I knew that by embracing and enjoying each part of the journey, I would slow down the time before the actual wedding day. I also figured that this strategy would help with the emotional let-down following a major event.
To slow down time, I need to stop thinking of each day as stressful or uncertain, stop trying to make something happen every moment, and start thinking about each day as an opportunity to enjoy the journey leading to whatever is next.
Are you an In-Between Space person, too? Do you embrace that side of you, or does it keep you frustrated and anxious?
Thank you for listening to the Your Stories Don’t Define You podcast!
There are still spots available for the fifth No Longer Virtual Conference coming up March 3rd and 4th, 2022 in Park City, Utah. Bringing entrepreneurs and innovators together in a small venue, limited to 40 people, to #connectbeyondthekeyboard, to learn from each other and grow in our personal and professional lives. Visit elkinsconsulting.com for more details and to view the fabulous agenda.
Are you facing a transition right now? A big birthday coming up, considering a major career change, retirement? Empty nesting or divorce?
Are you overwhelmed with the millions of opportunities that seem to be opening in our global community? Not sure where to start, what questions to ask yourself, and questioning what you’re even qualified for?
If you’re eager to start exploring and would appreciate a guide, my recently launched Discovering Clarity course is available now for just $149. I highly recommend that you register with a friend or group of friends to keep each other accountable, message me for a discount code for multiple registrations. Visit elkins consulting.com / discovering-clarity.
My friend Trent said this to me a few years ago: Hope is not a strategy.
Instead of "I hope this year is better" say "this year will be better." And then take steps to MAKE it better. In my work I call it planting seeds. Every day that my motivation drops I ask myself which seeds I can plant right. this. minute. to improve my future. I make myself choose two seeds, one for future income and one for the health of an important relationship. It's really amazing how much can change by simply taking small steps. But nothing changes if you say "I hope 2022 is better than 2021" and then do nothing to make that happen. What seeds will you plant today?
Episode 198: At What Point Do We Respond to Past Trauma to Define Ourselves with Intention?
At what point in our lives do we respond to our trauma and define who we are?
In Sarah Elkins' latest podcast, she and writer Cheryl Bostrom,
talk about Cheryl’s newest novel, "Sugar Birds", and the connections between the characters and pieces of ourselves.
Strengthen your trajectory in life as Sarah and Cheryl draw deeper into this topic of self-discovery through hardship.
Sugar Birds by Cheryl Bostrom: Entertaining and Full of Soul
*Note from Sarah: We're just two weeks away from publishing our 200th episode! If you're a fan of the podcast, we'd love to hear from you and include your words at the beginning of that episode. Simply email your thoughts to sarahelkins@elkinsconsulting.com, or record a short voice memo on your phone and email it to me. Thank you in advance for helping us celebrate this milestone!*
At what point in our lives do we respond to our trauma and define who we are?
In Sarah Elkins' latest podcast, she and writer Cheryl Bostrom,
talk about Cheryl’s newest novel, "Sugar Birds", and the connections between the characters and pieces of ourselves.
Cheryl discusses her characters in terms of her own experiences, some of which we may relate to including: running from trauma, struggling with depression, dodging emotional bullets, and becoming self-reflective.
Strengthen your trajectory in life as Sarah and Cheryl draw deeper into this topic of self-discovery through hardship.
"It arrived as so many of these things have for me, like pieces in the jigsaw puzzle or like you said like the mosaic that composes us or that helps us to see who we are becoming and how we are being shaped.”
*Show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
About Cheryl:
Cheryl Bostrom is the author of the award-winning novel, “Sugar
Birds”, a Pacific Northwest naturalist, photographer, and editor. Cheryl has also written two non-fiction books entitled “The View from Goose Ridge: Watching Nature Seeing Life” and “Children At Promise: 9 Principles to Help Kids Thrive in an at Risk World” with Dr. Tim Stuart.
Cheryl attended Pacific Lutheran University and Washington State University.
Visit Cheryl’s website, check out her books, and follow Cheryl on LinkedIn and Twitter to learn more!
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
Image of Sarah Elkins and her dog in the snow with Elkins Consulting logo and StrengthsFinder logo
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 197: Stories of Those Things We Don't Talk About
How do we respond and connect with others when discussing difficult topics such as miscarriages?
Join Sarah Elkins and coach, writer, and speaker, Sandra Winterbach, as they delve into a human response to infertility and the related reactions and interactions with the people in our lives.
Sandra shares her experience with learning about who she is and the importance of self-reflection for her health, and the way self-reflection contributes to gratification in her life.
Communication Starts with Me
*Note from Sarah: We're just a few weeks away from publishing our 200th episode! If you're a fan of the podcast, we'd love to hear from you and include your words in the beginning of that episode. Simply email your thoughts to sarahelkins@elkinsconsulting.com, or record a short voice memo on your phone and email it to me. Thank you in advance for helping us celebrate this milestone!*
How do we respond and connect with others when discussing difficult topics such as miscarriages?
Join Sarah Elkins and coach, writer, and speaker, Sandra Winterbach, as they delve into a human response to infertility and the related reactions and interactions with the people in our lives.
Sandra shares her experience with learning about who she is and the importance of self-reflection for her health, and the way self-reflection contributes to gratification in her life.
Image of Sandra Winterbach with quote for podcast cover art
“I’m doing my work right now, mostly for myself...to find my way through this and to realize how my own health is intricately related to what I can do for myself.”
*Show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 196: Get Out There! Dance! Be Silly! Don't Face Regret
I remember being shy, I remember being more self conscious than I am now. I like to say I don’t regret, but there are definitely some moments in my past that I wish I could do over again. A lot of them involve sitting out a great song because I was self conscious about dancing. Opportunities flew right past me: To sing with great musicians, to dance, to swim in the ocean. The memories of that person, the girl who didn’t raise her hand to volunteer on stage, the girl who said no to a cute boy because she didn’t think she could dance, the one who was so concerned about how she looked or that she might mess up a note, those memories came back to me as I watched the woman in the audience look away from me. What a waste.
Mae West Said It Best: "I Only Regret the Things I Didn't Do"
*Note from Sarah: We're just a few weeks away from publishing our 200th episode! If you're a fan of the podcast, we'd love to hear from you and include your words in the beginning of that episode. Simply email your thoughts to sarahelkins@elkinsconsulting.com, or record a short voice memo on your phone and email it to me. Thank you in advance for helping us celebrate this milestone!*
Sarah Elkins quote and image for podcast cover art.
She was sitting on a bench in the corner of the room, watching people dancing and having fun. I could see her toe tapping, she seemed to be enjoying the music, but I couldn’t really tell because her face didn’t show any signs of a smile. I saw her the last time our band played at that venue, and remembered when she quietly came to me afterward to tell me how much she liked our band, and that if she knew how to dance, she would have. She was so shy.
I called out to her from the stage: “Come on out, dance with us! I can see you want to! Come on out and have some fun!” I motioned to my friends on the dance floor, smiling to encourage her.
Sarah Elkins performing on stage with Bob Schmitt and the band Rocket to Uranus
She looked behind her, assuming I was talking to someone else. And then she looked straight at me with zero expression. I gave up. A song or two later, I noticed she had left her spot and walked further away from stage, watching from a safer distance.
I remember being shy, I remember being more self conscious than I am now. I like to say I don’t regret, but there are definitely some moments in my past that I wish I could do over again. A lot of them involve sitting out a great song because I was self conscious about dancing. Opportunities flew right past me: To sing with great musicians, to dance, to swim in the ocean. The memories of that person, the girl who didn’t raise her hand to volunteer on stage, the girl who said no to a cute boy because she didn’t think she could dance, the one who was so concerned about how she looked or that she might mess up a note, those memories came back to me as I watched the woman in the audience look away from me. What a waste.
How did things change for me? With a little help from my friends. I was lucky enough to have friends to pull me out on the dance floor, to volunteer me to get on a stage, to tell me not to be scared. Now I’m that friend.
Rocket to Uranus on stage at Lewis and Clark Brewing, Helena, Montana 2019
At some point in my life, I realized:
It doesn’t matter if you do something silly, as long as you own it. The audience likes to see you laugh, and if there are hecklers, they really don’t matter.
The majority of the people in the audience want to see you succeed, they want to see you having fun, and many are thinking about how brave you are for getting up there.
I tell my friends, my coaching clients, my children, that they must step up when an opportunity presents itself. If, for just a moment, you think “wow, that looks like fun, I wonder what it’s like to…,” take it. Leave that self conscious person behind and take the leap.
Sarah Elkins quote and image for podcast cover art.
Living with regret is not living. When you don’t have the energy or physical ability to dance, you will be sitting in the corner, thinking “what I’d give to dance right now. I love this song.”
I hope not. I know I won’t be that person.
I’ll be the one holding the mic.
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
Image of Sarah with dog, Toby, in the snow with Elkins Consulting logo and Gallup StrengthsFinder logo
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 195: The Shame Doctor's Gift
John Dunia didn’t become the Shame Doctor overnight. His journey from a junior high kid discovering his love for music to releasing his first book took years, and the struggle of his 22-year-old marriage falling apart was a catalyst in his personal growth and professional career shift.
He found writing his novel was a time to self-reflect and contemplate the experiences that brought him to where he is today, and believed that sharing those experiences could guide others to find relief from self-doubt and anger.
Stories of Shame and How it Differs from Guilt
John Dunia image and quote podcast cover art
John Dunia didn’t become the Shame Doctor overnight. His journey from a junior high kid discovering his love for music to releasing his first book took years, and the struggle of his 22-year-old marriage falling apart was a catalyst in his personal growth and professional career shift.
He found writing his novel was a time to self-reflect and contemplate the experiences that brought him to where he is today, and believed that sharing those experiences could guide others to find relief from self-doubt and anger.
The moments that sparked the passion in John’s life are something we all have encountered whether we realize it or not.
John Dunia book cover image and quote for podcast cover art
For John, one of those moments was listening to Switched-on-Bach in high school, an encounter that changed the course of his life. For John, different experiences, from meeting with a therapist to listening to his friend’s older brother’s music, influenced the way he perceived the world.
Today’s podcast episode starts with John’s stories about being a band teacher. This is the beginning to the discussion about John’s life and the moments that brought him clarity.
About John:
John Dunia is the author of “Shame on Me”, a Principle at Shamedoctor.com, and a public speaker helping others find their purpose. John is also an ambassador for HumansFirst, a featured writer & columnist for BIZCATALYST 360°, and a sales representative for several companies.
John attended California State University with a Bachelor’s degree in Music Performance. He also attended Pasadena City College.
Visit John's website, take his self assessment, and follow John on LinkedIn and Facebook to learn more!
*podcast show notes contributed by Tracy Ackeret
ABOUT SARAH:
Image of Sarah Elkins and her dog, Toby, with Elkins Consulting logo and StrengthsFinder logo
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.
Episode 186: True Stories Can Bring Your Work of Fiction to Life
Our conversation easily flowed from topic to topic, and it was clear to both of us that the themes from the book are highly relevant in many of our friends' lives, as well as our own.
Each of the protagonists is in a very different place in their lives, one in her early 30s, another in her mid 40s, and another in her late 60s. And yet, each is grappling with transition and transformation in their lives, which is what brings them together.
A Novel About Transformation and Resilience Includes Aspects of Truth
Suzanne Simonetti sees parts of herself in each of her characters, but she relates most closely with Krystal in her award-winning novel The Sounds of Wings.
Suzanne Simonetti podcast episode cover art with image and quote
Our conversation easily flowed from topic to topic, and it was clear to both of us that the themes from the book are highly relevant in many of our friends' lives, as well as our own.
Each of the protagonists is in a very different place in their lives, one in her early 30s, another in her mid 40s, and another in her late 60s. And yet, each is grappling with transition and transformation in their lives, which is what brings them together.
Highlights for me:
A major theme of the book is silencing our own ghosts from our past. We must be able to tell the stories of our paths without reliving them, to be able to see those stories as lessons to take forward.
Suzanne Simonetti podcast episode cover art book cover and quote
A theme that resonated strongly with me is the way women grow into relationships with themselves and with (and among) other women. In the book, the three main protagonists forge unlikely friendships, despite their distinct differences. I loved seeing the personal growth each experienced as they learned to trust the other women who happened to show up in their lives.
We spoke of Suzanne's mentor, award-winning, NYT Best Selling Author Caroline Leavitt, as well as our mutual friend, Meg Nocero, also an award-winning author, both outstanding women you will be glad you discovered through this podcast.
Make sure you follow Suzanne on Instagram, and check out her website to learn more.
Elkins Consulting cover art image of Sarah Elkins and her dog on a wintery, snow covered mountain
ABOUT SARAH:
"Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision."
In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with.
My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home.
The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available!
Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana.